In society today, one’s sexuality can have far-reaching consequences. Sexuality may influence our choices in the work we do, where we live, how we worship, and other intimate areas of life. Sexuality is often associated with one’s identity and what it means to be an individual. With all of the meaning that is carried with sexuality, there is the potential for an individual to question their own feelings. It is far from the case that all people simply know their sexuality or can identify with a particular group. Although many people do not express any confusion or concern regarding their sexuality, this is not the case for a great number of individuals who find that their questions regarding their sexuality are not so easily answered.
Sexuality is not defined by one behaviour or one feeling, or even by one experience. It is a highly complex human response that can be influenced by a variety of factors in its expression. What does seem to be clear that sexual preference is not a choice. One cannot control or determine who they are attracted to – whatever their sexuality. While many people have clear preferences, it is largely outside their ability to change that attraction, or lack thereof. Read More »
Sexual abuse is one of the most difficult experiences an individual may ever face. It is also incredibly common. While damage inflicted on the body may heal, sexual abuse leaves emotional scars that can be just as troubling as physical ones, and in some cases they can be even worse. Although the immediate pain and trauma subside, the truth is that there can be long-term consequences for the victims of sexual abuse. That being said, the process of healing might be centered on the body, not in the mind.
Victims of abuse often respond with a physical reaction known as the “fight or flight” response. The body learns to release adrenaline in situations that recreate the feelings of terror and pain, and as a result, this can become a pattern that the victim experiences again and again. Read More »
If the above sentence applies to you, the following passages may be of some help in coming to terms with the new situation. Firstly, it must be said that everyone’s situation will be different, although some similarities will be prevalent in all. The first similarity will be the feeling of being stunned, followed by rising panic or bewilderment when you first find out. Even if you may already have had an inkling as to the sexuality of your daughter, to have it confirmed will still be a significant moment in your life.
Don’t worry! This is perfectly normal when any news of an unexpected nature is received. It is also worthwhile keeping in mind that your daughter may have been thinking of telling you for many weeks or months that she is a lesbian, and so has had quite some time to be prepared. You, on the other hand, have had to react to the news instantly.Read More »
In my years as a therapist, I have been paying growing attention to shame in working with my clients, and I must confess that attending to this feeling is quintessential to the practice of psychotherapy. Other than that, I had several other exciting revelations.Read More »
A recent study indicated that gay, lesbian and bisexual’s who decided that they should come out showed an increase in happiness and an improvement of their overall mental health. Of course, it goes without saying that there are many factors behind this, just as there are many levels of ‘outness’. Below, we go over the decision making process involved in coming out, and what may happen when you decide to do so.
For many people, coming out is a hard decision to make. They will be concerned as to how family and friends will react, and if coming out at a later stage of life, how their career may be affected. These are all legitimate concerns, and go in some way to explain part of the study. It is clear that if a lot of anxiety and stress has been building regarding whether to come out or not, there will be a certain degree of relief when it finally happens!