50 Shades Of Sexuality

In society today, one’s sexuality can have far-reaching consequences. Sexuality may influence our choices in the work we do, where we live, how we worship, and other intimate areas of life. Sexuality is often associated with one’s identity and what it means to be an individual. With all of the meaning that is carried with sexuality, there is the potential for an individual to question their own feelings. It is far from the case that all people simply know their sexuality or can identify with a particular group. Although many people do not express any confusion or concern regarding their sexuality, this is not the case for a great number of individuals who find that their questions regarding their sexuality are not so easily answered.

Sexuality is not defined by one behaviour or one feeling, or even by one experience. It is a highly complex human response that can be influenced by a variety of factors in its expression. What does seem to be clear that sexual preference is not a choice. One cannot control or determine who they are attracted to – whatever their sexuality. While many people have clear preferences, it is largely outside their ability to change that attraction, or lack thereof.  Read More »

On Overcoming Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse is one of the most difficult experiences an individual may ever face.  It is also incredibly common. While damage inflicted on the body may heal, sexual abuse leaves emotional scars that can be just as troubling as physical ones, and in some cases they can be even worse. Although the immediate pain and trauma subside, the truth is that there can be long-term consequences for the victims of sexual abuse. That being said, the process of healing might be centered on the body, not in the mind.

Victims of abuse often respond with a physical reaction known as the “fight or flight” response. The body learns to release adrenaline in situations that recreate the feelings of terror and pain, and as a result, this can become a pattern that the victim experiences again and again. Read More »

A brief insight into “Madonna whore complex”

The Madonna Whore Complex is a psychoanalytical term, coined by Sigmund Freud to describe a male psychological dichotomy in the perception of women – either as saint or sinner. The complex was termed as such by Sigmund Freud, but this dichotomy seems to have existed since time immemorial. Some men experience the inability to view a woman as a whole, but can only view her through the perception of either saint or sinner. The cultural portrayal of men and women as adhering to fixed gender roles also does not help in overcoming this flawed perception of women. Needless to say, this can take a serious toll on personal relationships and many of those who are impacted seek the help of a counsellor to deal with the problem.

According to the Madonna Whore Complex, men either view a woman as a sexually restrained and well behaved ‘Madonna’, or as a sexually free ‘whore’ who must be punished by the man. Read More »

Coping with Big Life Changes

Life is constantly throwing challenges at us, sometimes big, sometimes small. One of the biggest challenges in life is dealing with an important change. All big changes in life, whether they are expected and predictable, or sudden and shocking, have one thing in common, they cause stress. Human beings are naturally resistant to change, and so fatigue, stress and a degree of anxiety come with any big life change. Sometimes, coping with change can become very difficult and it becomes necessary to seek professional counselling.Read More »

Can loneliness affect our health?

Loneliness is not a disease, but it sure does feel like one Loneliness is not a disease, but it sure does feel like one. But assuming it was an ailment, the doctor’s diagnosis would be something like this:

  • The person feels unacceptable and unloved to others.
  • He/she feels like there is no one with whom to share their personal experiences or concerns
  • The person finds it a strenuous activity making new friends
  • The person finds it difficult relating to others on a level deeper than an acquaintance

And such like other symptoms.
Read More »

Dealing with relationship problems

relationship-crisisAny relationship will always have its highs and lows, its laughter and its sadness. It is a constantly changing dynamic involving people who are also changing as they get older. Most people expect there to be a few bumps in the road, but it is when those bumps become seemingly insurmountable hurdles that real relationship problems can set in.

Every relationship is different, but there are a number of common issues which arise. These are:

Read More »